Handling jealousy in an open relationship

Do you remember all those images of the 1960’s, where sexual liberation was rife and people practiced free-love? These days people tend to refer to it as an ‘open relationship’, so the practice is far from dying. However the idea of sharing partners, or having your partner being with someone else can be too much to deal with; which is probably why there are only so many people who can actually handle that approach to coupling. It won’t take very long for feelings of jealousy to settle in; so how does one come to peace with such an ambiguous concept?

Sharing is caring?

You’ve most likely heard that saying before, but it mainly seems to apply to sharing money, food or other items with your friends. It can also apply to charity, where you pass along things that other people cannot afford. What most people don’t expect is for it to be relevant to sharing their actual partner. Let’s say your best friend hasn’t been getting laid in a while, would you be so generous as to suggest them they can have fun with your girlfriend or boyfriend? Most importantly, would your partner be up for it? It seems that for this to work, both partners have to be on the same page.

A mutual agreement

No one likes to be cheated on, but what if this is something you’ve discussed and agreed on? After all it is true that people can get bored of each other over time, and spicing things up can bring some life back into a relationship. It comes down to this, can you accept that someone else could give pleasure to your partner and have a good time with them, all the while not losing the love and respect your partner has for you. In other words, can you sleep around with other people and come back to your relationship afterwards? As long as you set some rules and boundaries, it could actually work.

Finding new partners

It seems that the key to having an open relationship is to make sure that you or your partner discuss what happens if you fall in love with your other lovers. So if you decide to have fun, maybe you should do it with people you don’t know so well; as opposed to getting your close friends involved. That way you will limit the amount of emotional involvement; and you will also keep your friendships intact. Ideally you will meet new potential partners when you go on a night out, or even approach people by using adult dating websites. You can find horny women near you, or even horny men, all it generally takes is to find the right site. This will all help to keep your fun at a casual level.

Still feeling jealousy?

Some people love to see their partner having fun with someone else, there is just something about it that makes us tick. It really depends on whether you are able to draw a line between your private emotional life and your sex life. If you trust your partner and you know they will stick with you, then you might not have to feel so jealous. Even though they are taking pleasure from someone else, you are still involved in the act so you are still part of the reason why your partner is having such good time. It is different from someone having an affair, where your partner would actually be getting pleasure behind your back without your involvement. You would therefore have good reasons to feel jealous, but in the case of sharing and doing it all out of your own free will; you can stay in control of it all. Let’s face it, couples could eventually get bored, so whilst you might not consider an open relationship just yet, maybe it will be a good thing to look into further down the line!

 

ELust Site Badge

  Welcome to Elust #29

Your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in Elust #30? Start with the rules, check out the schedule and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~

Evidence To The ContraryIf anyone out there ever tries to tell you that internet relationships and friendships are not real, point them in my direction and I will happily set them straight on the matter because I have proof, in fact I am proof, that they know not what they speak of.

Open Marriages Don’t Work….The only way I would agree with that statement is if you add: …..if you’re marriage already has problems.  But even that part is not universally true.

Love in the Age of Broadband What happened to our ability to keep it casual? Why would we attach ourselves to someone who is (often) hundreds, if not thousands, of miles away? And, more to the point, why would we attach ourselves to someone we have never met?

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Ask Lilly – Open and Polyamorous: Why be married at all?

~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~

My apologies, everyone, since submissions closed I’ve been 100% consumed with personal family tragedy (the flooding in Central PA) so I didn’t have time to read most of the entries this time or find a photo. The html code might contain a lot of blank lines for some of you, I didn’t have time to “clean” it up, either, just throw up what I have.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Ask Aunty Dee: Dental Dams
born this way…
Clit Truth
Condoms and Size
Lies & Infidelities
Misguided Dominance
Poly Language
Return to Decadence
Step Inside My Head
Who was the first person you told..
When Bad Things Happen To Good People – Warning Bells

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

To Be Out Or Not To Be Out
Want Sado-Erotic Horror Movies? Yes please! Films by Matthew Saliba
What I’ve Learned From E[Lust]

Kink & Fetish

A Much Needed Distraction
Another drink?
Caged
Facing Fear
Negotiation Win

Erotic Writing

As Long As It Lasts
Asking For It
Anticipation
Blow Job
Campfire
Debra’s Gift
Feral
Fantasy
June’s Caning
Please, Please, Please, Sir
Showers and Strawberries
slick
The Visitor
The Play Fight

Last updated by at .